The Power of a Tag

I thought of this post a while and am just now publishing it. Thought of the message in church.

Today in church, a woman told me my shirt tag was out and I tucked it in. I never noticed the tag was out. It did not bother me.

But I began to wonder when did tags start sticking out became taboo Tags can be annoying and irritating but tags also provide care instructions. How to wash and properly dry for long wear? If you don't like the tag, you can rip it out or cut it out.

So let's apply that to our lives. When we have something sticking out at us--whether a problem, concern, or issue-- we can do the following:

1. Wait for someone to tell us we have a problem. Tuck it in and hide the problem without really resolving the issue. 
2. Develop a care routine  to resolve the problem or maintain it because some people really love their problems. 
3. Cut it out/Rip it out. Remove the problem or issue, either carefully to leave no traces or forcefully, leaving little bits behind as reminders of the past. 

Now, let's apply to past loves and relationships. Maybe someone pointed out a problem  and you did nothing. Maybe you stopped communicating with them or resented them for saying anything. 

Maybe you want to do better. You stop having sex as much. You reflect on the relationship. Write a list of pros and cons Change yourself, Try to change him/her. Go out more. Re-spark the passion. 

OR

Break-up for good. Remove the person from your life. Delete numbers. Remove from social media. Block, ignore, delete.

Maybe you remove them partially. Still allow them to linger in your lives, knowing they are still causing physical or emotional damage. 

For example, the ex husband and I separated in 2005. We still had sex off and on until 2010. Having sex was not strengthening our relationship with God. Having sex did not repair the marriage. .He was still having sex with others, and so was I. 

I realized sleeping with him was sending mixed messages. My old thought processes said since I am over here, I might as well have sex with him. No different than before we separated. I told him in 2010, we can't have sex anymore and he still tried again and again, even during my last visit to GA in 2011. I was celibate then and he asked why did I come on the trip. (so he and his family can see the kids, duh). I had no intention on sleeping with him, but he had other plans. 

HAPPILY DIVORCED :-)

In Sunday School, I learned a relationship is based on God and love. We both believed in God, but the relationship needed more of God. He was one of those forcefully removed tags, which still left little pieces behind. I still have to deal with him because of the kids, but I don't have to sleep with him. I definitely don't have to remarry him (he already remarried.)

+Stacie Wyatt @2014 Stacie D .Wyatt/Celibacy Diaries.